Post 44:: Fuck You and Dishonor Upon Your Cow

You honestly don't even deserve a post.
But here we go, because no matter how much I say I don't care, we both know that I do.
I care a lot.
And you know I care, and you are manipulating me and using me.
Because you know what I want, and you know that it's you.
I know what you are doing.
I've known for a while.
But I've been too lovesick to stop.
And now I'm just sick.
I'm sick of you, and your stupid little games.
I'm sick of you breaking my heart, over and over.
I'm sick of feeling not good enough
worthless
left out
and unwanted.
I'm sick of your attitude towards me, because you thought I was always going to be there.
I was.
You know that ?
I was always going to be there for you.
But people change, kiddo.
People change and you're the only one who hasn't changed.
Once, I thought you had changed.
I thought, 'heyy. you weren't like this when I first met you".
But now ?
Now I realize that. . . yeahh. You were like this. You have always, always been like this.
You have just hid it from me, oh-so-well.
You say that my emotions are 'so last summer' ?
Darling. . . . I love you.
I do.
But you're getting older than last summer.

Post 43:: Updates And Shittttt

I figured I'd talk about a few different things today, seeing as I haven't posted in an eternity.
Firstly, I have successfully graduated from highschool.
You may all applaud wildly.
Last week, I was writing my thank-you notes for my graduation party, and there was someone on my list who none of us knew, but my dad had written down that she gave me a book. And she lived in Pennsylvania, so we were all really confused, but I didn’t want to leave anyone out, so i wrote Mrs. Maureen Detailer a thank you note for the graduation gift
And sent it
And today i realized
That she sent me a book
Because I ordered it
Used
From Amazon.com
And so now I feel slightly ridiculous.

Secondly, I've had a rather on and off relationship recently, that has been incredibly rough on me, but not on the boy that it is with, not at all. My heart feels like it's being shoved in a blender, because I know for a fact that he's not fucking worth it, but. . . . ahh, I just. . . I can't get over him.


Thirdly, I not only went to The Devil's Carnival original tour in Ohio, but I am now attending The Devil's Carnival encore tour, which is now coming to Jackson, Michigan. I am excited, not only for the movie and the night spent with my friend in a hotel, but for a nice roadtrip-ish experience again. I miss roadtrips. I wish i could go on a genuine roadtrip again before college starts, but. . . I don't see it happening. I would really, really love to go camping this August. Like. . . . really, really. And all of my friends have super exiting summer lives.
Lol.
I don't do anything.
I don't have a super exciting summer life.
I don't even have a summer life.
I've sat here and rewatched Arrested Development in anticipation of the movie, for the last week. That's what I've done. My great contribution to society.

I did have a job for awhile, at a supermarket. But they fired me. Because I didn't speak Arabic. Like, what. . . . I don't. . . whaaaa. . . 

anyway, that's all, kids. Some concerts coming up: Emilie Autumn, Nightwish, Kamelot, One-Eyed Doll, Otep. . .. yeahh, life is ok.

Still not sure if I'm going to the One-Eyed Doll/Otep concert, because it's an 18+ venue and my cousin Robin wouldn't be able to go and I'd feel super duper shitty if I went without her.

Post 42:: If you can tell me why I'm sad, I'll give you the world.

Breaking up isn't easy
I know it isn't easy
I never said it was
But it hurts when the person you broke up with
Doesn't even ask you to stay with them
I just feel so unloved right now
And lonely
And upset
And disgusting
I need a break from. . . life, basically.
Where do I go from here. . . I have no idea
I guess there's two paths
One is being Lonely
And the other is Abuse
. . . .
. . . . . . . . Abuse it is.

Post 41:: Hello, Please Have Sex With Me

Something is going on in my life right now, that I can't really explain. It's complicated. My heart's all twisted up and weird and I don't know who to turn to except. . myself.
Because really, it's my personal choice, and no one else can decide it for me.
Although I really, really wish that they could.
The thing is. . . that . . .
I know what I need to do.
It's so obvious which one I should be with.
But I can't force myself to hurt the other one.

Anywayy, enough cryptic nonsense.
"Stop saying, 'i know how you feel'. How could anyone know how it feels ?" <--Nightwish, "Song Of Myself".

Ohh, let's talk about Nightwish for a bit.
OMG TARJA'S AMAZING ANETTE SUCKS ASS LOLOLOLOLOLOL OMG
uhhh, no. . . . kidding.
I love Anette.
Have you guys heard Imaginaerum ?
 I downloaded it the dayy it was released in the UK [. .  . erm]] >.>
And yeahh, i've been listening to it pretty much on repeat since then. It's kind of amazing, I really need to buy the actual album.
In my opinion, it's their best album. Wishmaster was really good, Once was really good, and Dark Passion Play was pretty awesome as well, some of my favorite Nightwish songs are off of DPP. "The Islander", and "Amaranth", for example. Also the bonus track "The Escapist". "The Escapist" is probably my favorite Nightwish song, next to "Amaranth". And then there's Imaginaerum and i'm like 'THIS WHOLE ALBUM IS MY FAVORITE SONG"
Although the album-title-song confused me. Track 13, "Imaginaerum" is an instrumental. It's amazing, and wonderful. However, in the special edition of the album, there's an instrumental version of every song. . . including track 13. And here's the best thing: The two instrumental "Imaginaerum"s are different lengths.
They're not the same time.
Lol. . . what. . . .

Moving right along at our usual clipped pace, I've decided to start gardening this year. I used to grow beans. . . and that was fantastic. They grew taller than my dad, which I found to be an accomplishment because I was like 12 or so and I thought my dad was really tall. [he's about six feet tall. I'm 5'6" so he's not that tall to me anymore.Especially after dating someone who's 6'4"]]
So todayy I cleaned out two different soil boxes, and I started soaking some pea-seeds, so I'll be planting those later todayy when my friend Gabri comes over.
We're going to be going to the midnight premiere of The Hunger Games.
Wooooo !
I should be more excited. . and I was, earlier, but. . now I'm worried about someone.
So I'm not half as excited as I should be.
I worry about this person a lot, actually.
They have something to do with that decision-thingy I was talking about up there ^^^^^

Gosh
It's really hard to blog about my life
When I can't tell you about it
Isn't it. . .

There's someone I really like
And it's a problem.
That's all.

Post 40:: Lonely and Alone

Today has just been. . awful. It was fine until a certain point. Someone is pulling me into something that I shouldn't be a part of, and I finally couldn't keep it to myself anymore so I just let it all out to my mum. . . . and now she's mad at the person and she is looking into what to do about teenage bullying, because this person. . is just harassing me over and over. I don't respond to an email and she sends me more, i block her email and SHE MAKES A NEW EMAIL and keeps at it. So yeahh. I'm going through. . really, really harsh bullying that is upsetting me a lot, and I'm trying so hard not to let it get to me, but. .. ugh.

Also, I got accepted to Wayne State University todayy !!!! But my mum wasn't happy for me. . she just discouraged me by sayying all this awful stuff about how I wouldn't have a good-paying job and stuff and I should go into something else. .

Here is the best song in the world to me, at the moment::

Post 39:: Just Some Depressing Stuff as per usual

Is it wrong to be jealous of someone's happiness ?
Especially if that person. . is your own boyfriend. . . .

Whenever I play League of Legends with him and his friends, theyy all get along really well and theyy joke around and theyy just. . I don't know.
Their happiness just pisses me off for some reason, because none of my friends play League of Legends with me, none of my friends do any of the slightly more nerdy things that I do, except for Robin. But she's a much lower level than I am, and for some reason I can't joke around with her about our games, I mean, I want to, but for some reason I can't. We do have our own jokes and stuff, but. . . gah. It's just. . . I don't know. It's not the same kind of joking.
I wish I could just hang out and play League with Aidan.
Goddammit I'm so fucking clingy I hate myself for it
But I really can't stop it
And i feel like if I ever hung out with Aidan and his friends in person, they would all hate me, and Aidan would think I was an idiot or something like that, because I'm outside of all of their jokes, and they disinclude me. Theyy don't mean to, I'm sure theyy don't. But theyy do. And i never know what to do or where to go and I don't want to be that one person who fed the other team and made us lose the game.

Also, I have this one really close friend and he lives an hour away from me, and i never get to see him and I miss him alot. And I feel like I'm being annoying as all hell when I bother him and ask him to hang out with me, I know he wants to spend more time with other people, and i know I'm too far away and he doesn't have a car, but. . . gah. I just feel like such a prick. i guess i will leave him alone more.

I'm pretty sure all of my friends hate me. Theyy never call me. Not one of them, ever. Julia has phone anxiety, so she's off the hook. She does invite me over alot, so yeahh. . but the others. . have no excuse.
And then I get the overspoken, 'Alaina, whyy haven't you called me lately ?"
ohh. . . is it my job to call you ?
i didn't know that.
Thanks for telling me, you pretentious asshat.

\sigh\\
Ohh
Wayne got my transcripts todayy
w00t.

Post 38:: Because I Can.

^^Best excuse ever.

If I asked you guys to babysit my kids, what would you say ??

Post 37:: Fuck the Haters That speak, Cause I Hate That You Breathe

yeah, my left shift-key button doesn't work, and i never use the right shift-key button, so there are going to be quite a few errors in this blogpost. it's not that i'm not pressing the key. i am. i just capitalized all of those i's. all of them. and that 'a'.
\groan\\
fuckin' . . . . nevermind.

my boyfriend is kind of a dick.
but whatever, mann. . . i mean. . . i don't know. i love him. he just has no sense of normal relationships. like, there's stuff that you just don't tell people. . . and he doesn't get it.  ohh well. i mean. . . he's just a little boy, after all. He acts so grown up and mature, but. .. .he's not.
it's ohkayy though. it's how all boys are. i just wish . .  gah i don't know what i wish.

new year's eve is coming !!! plans have changed, and victorian and i are going to some random bed&+breakfast in Romeo or some place like that. we've got a room and a laptop and movies and no mum. our plans so far consist of::
--> snacks
--> REPO: the genetic Opera
--> Sweeney Todd
-->Gypsy 83
--> The lion king 2
--> more snacks
--> wild partying
ohh and
--> strippers and popcorn.
LOL JUST KIDDING
about the popcorn

Anywayy my plugs keep falling out of my ears for no apparent reason. i've been wearing this pair for like,  . . the past year or something and they've never done that, but all of a sudden, they're like, 'cool, kayybye i'mma fall off now'' and i'm just like, 'ohh shit mann''. it's harsh.

tomorrow i'm going to Julia's house. I invited myself over. Cause i'm fucking boss.

i dyed my hair red

so deal with it, bitches.
yeahh it fucking glows.
i've been listening to Hollywood Undead too much.
i'm swearing like a motherfucking sailor.
but who cares, really. . . pirates are sexy and we all know it.
THIS MAN looks pretty good too. it's the longer hair and the clothing. so hot. i like my men older. lolkidding. i dated a 13 year old once.
anywayy
i'd like to forget about Tyler, thank you very much.
i really gotta stop blogging at such odd hours

Post 36:: Merry Vodka Christmas.

I'm kinda tipsy right now, I'm not even gonna lie.
Fuckin'. . .  . Christmas. . .  So terrible, mann.
SO TERRIBLE.
Said some things I really shouldn't have said, and then ran away. . . . and sat outside of the library, cause you know i'm just so fucking badass, awwwww yeeeeaaa.
I totally don't know what shirt size Aidan is, cause I've seen the tags on 8 of his shirts and theyy were all different sizes. So then I decided to go and look at the shirts that he had let me borrow. One was XL and one was S. So like, what in the actual fuck ?? I guess I need to wait for him to get home so I can ask him what size he is, cause. . yeahh.
Good news:: I'm getting a cell phone. Whoop-de-fucking-doo;; I'm almost 18, might as well buy my own fucking phone ? Derp.
Bad news:: my dad gets to pick it out and it's going to be pay as you go.
This is whyy it is going to be a shit-as-you-go:: Cause back in February or no, wait it was January, back when I had my own phone, I gave my dad $5 and he was like, 'unlimited texting ? Sure." and then two dayys later he said he got it for me. But guess what ? He didn't. So i went WAYY over my amount of texts that he had gotten me, not knowing that i didn't have unlimited.
So it's my dad's fault, right ?
Wrong.
It's somehow my fault.
BUT HOW IS IT MY FAULT. I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW I WAS DOING ANYTHING WRONG, HE TOLD ME THAT I HAD UNLIMITED.
Whaaaaaaaat.
Aah, my arms are so tired and I can already tell that I'm going to have a hangover tomorrow. . .I have to go to a cocktail party tomorrow, a black-tie-affair, and my hair is currently the colour of fuckin'. . . rudolph's nose. I'm not kidding. The first dayy i dyed it, it was literally glowing. In the dark. My family laughed so hard. .
Anywayy.
Whyy are theyy called cocktails ?
Is it because after you've had enough, the cock goes up your-- nevermind.
I spent wayy too much money this christmas and then I only got one thing for Aidan, i need to get him something else but I don't know what to get him, because i want it to be meaningful; last year I knitted him a scarf that was really nice. . . he said he loved it, but i don't know cause he never wears it as far as i can see, but whatever that's not my call. And it's not like i ever see him anywayy, so how do I even know ?
Hurmf.
Ideas, ideas. . .
Julia said to get him food.
i got him food for his birthdayy.
Ohh, his birthdayy.. . . I got him a birthdayy present ! He didn't get me anything for my birthdayy. Maybe the birthdayy present I got him can like. . . carry over into Christmas. .
. . . Nevermind. I'll just get him something else. I'll think of something and I'll give it to him, cause I heard he had a pretty bad christmas so far.
Gah, i haven't played League of Legends in like 3 dayys, NEW RECORD.
I miss Aserus. I bet he's leveled up. . . . . . I miss that kid.

For New Year's my mum and I are going to the Bavarian Inn or whatever that one place in Frankenmuth is; with the water park or whatever, and we're taking my second-cousin Robin. [side note:: Robin now plays League of Legends, and her username is Victorian Android (like her blog name)) and I am so used to calling her 'Victorian" that yesterdayy I called her 'Victorian" instead of 'Robin", i thought it was really funny, but anywayy i digress]] The only problem with this arrangement is that I'm kind of terrified of water ?? I'm hydrophobic and I don't swim. . Like, i kinda-sorta-KINDA got over that this Summer, but not really, I'm still scared as shit to go swimming, and I don't wanna go in past my knees, I would reallly rather just avoid water at all. . . Ohh and my dad isn't coming, cause he has 'obligations".
I'm tired of him bailling out. . there was so much tension todayy.
So much tension, doe. .
. . He's being such. . a jerk. . . lately. . . gotta go make another screwdriver because my mum just came in and saw that I was drinking, and she didn't even yell, she just sat down and cried while i typed and then asked me if I would make her one, so here we go bitches, drinking with my mum while i'm 17, ohh fuckyea.

Post 35:: Back To the Same Old Thing.

as you know from Post 33, my dayy has been such utter crap. And i really wanted to talk to this one guy. So badly. And then when we finally had time to talk, he wanted to play LoL. And then he went to play another game with his friend Ben, and I didn't want to play.
So he went and played without me.
I, of course, was a bitch about it to him.
But this time i feel like he deserved it.
Ben was feeling down. .. . that's great.
I'm sorry your friend was upset.
But guess what, there's someone else in your life who's upset, and she wants five minutes of your time to talk to you. When we talked earlier, he was playing minecraft. Then he wanted to play LoL. I'm tired of these games--literally. I know he gives me a lot and I know he makes so many sacrifices for me but sometimes it doesn't fucking feel like he gives a rat's ass about me.
Which i know is unreasonable, because I know he cares.
It just doesn't feel like it sometimes.
Like right now.

Post 34:: Leekspin and Body Parts.

So, my boyfriend watches the Leekspin videos. . . . . and apparently he dances around his friend's basement madly for the duration of them.
Obviously,  I've known about Leekspin for awhile. Hell, Leekspin.com used to be on my favorites.
But. . .. . . . he likes Leekspin ?
SINCE WHEN ?
I really don't know as much about him as I thought I did. . . come to think of it, I hardly know anything about his actual life at all. Like, he never tells me. .. . anything. . . . just when he's upset about something. I never hear about those random little things. Like what he had for dinner.
But I'm guessing if I knew what he had for dinner, I would just sit quietly feeling hurt that he supports the cruelty of the meat industry. So. Maybe it's better.
But.
Leekspin. . . . . . dayumn.
Also, the longest I've leekspun is 23:48. In case you were wondering.

Anywayy, i hate it when girls are like, "I hate my___".
And it's a body part that I've never ever thought to hate about myself.
This girl on Dailybooth was like, "this is why I hate my nose !!" And her nose looked fine to me. .
I was sitting there like, "but . . . what's wrong with your nose ?? It's just a nose. Are noses something to be self-conscious about ? Oh my god, what if i have a horrible nose and i never payyed attention to it. . . "

Thanks for making me insecure, random girls. Thank you so much. I haven't been having a problem with that as it is, obviously.


Ohh, so I was helping with this musical that was apparently 300 kinds of hot shit, and they're making it into a CD/DVD. I have doubts and speculations, but we'll see where this goes. \cough\\nowhere ?\cough\\

I want to write a story. . . very badly. . but I wouldn't know what to write about. I just. . can't think of anything. My mind, it's blank. . . I need inspiration. Someone inspire me.

Post 33:: Killing Myself Over College.

I'm not really going to kill myself. . . But I am very upset and I did cry a lot both todayy and yesterdayy.
Here's the deal::
I'm homeschooled, so my transcripts don't get sent anywhere fast. My mum didn't request that my transcripts be sent into Wayne, and i asked her to over a month ago. She said she had requested them, but todayy i got fed up with just waiting around and not seeing my admission to Wayne going anywhere anytime soon. So I called the office of Admissions at Wayne and then I called MODG [the homeschooling curriculum that's supposed to send in my shit]] and they were like, 'there was never a request for transcripts" and i was like 'are you fucking with me ?" only i didn't really sayy that because it's a Catholic homeschooling program and I didn't think theyy would appreciate it, plus I'm just a nice person.
Anywayy, so here's the thing:: I need the presidential scholarship. It's basically free college. . . and I'm eligible for it. So uhh. Fuck yeahh. And. I need this scholarship, but in order to get it, you need to attend 'Scholar's Day" and in order to attend Scholar's Day you need to receive an invite for it in the mail. But since Wayne hasn't gotten my transcripts yet, theyy can't even consider me for an invitation and the invites are being sent out in the beginning of January; My transcripts won't even be there by then.

If I miss Scholar's Day then I don't get a scholarship and if i don't get a scholarship then I don't get to go to college there and I have to go to Community College which is a nightmare for me and I refuse to do this.

Pretty much my entire future is leaning on me going to Wayne.
I refuse to go to stupid-people-college, aka Community College.
It's not that people who go there are stupid, it's that I personally think that I wouldn't get much from an education at a Community College. I could teach myself better than the professors there.

. .. . . guys.
This is whyy we don't homeschool our children.

Post 32:: Thanksgiving For Vegans.

This year, instead of going to my Aunt Kathy and Uncle Joe's, where I usually go, I got permission to go to my second- cousin Robin's house.
I AM SO EXCITED !!!!
In case I haven't said so already, Robin is a fellow Vegetarian/Vegan, and her mother is an incredibly wonderful cook. She makes boss pierogi, too. . .
Anywayy, I'm also spending the night there, which I'm excited for.
And she's making food that I can eat.
Vegetarian food.
Delicious food.
I'M SO HAPPY !!!!!!!
I don't think I'm going Black Fridayy shopping this year, but really.. . . who cares ?
I'm glad I don't have to wake up at some obscene time in the morning.

I am going to miss my Aunt Kathy's mushroom turnovers, though. . I wait all year round for those things. \\=

Post 31:: Karma Or Bad Luck ?

So, recently, I've decided to paint my room. . So I bought a gallon of grey paint. And I've painted about half of my room so far.

Yesterdayy, I had a bad dayy. My school files accidentally got deleted permanently, I complained a lot, I felt really under-appreciated, and my mother and I got into a yelling argument that developed into a full- out fist fight that was separated by my dad.
She didn't apologize.
Neither did I.

Todayy, I went into my room and found that my paint can, with a little over a third of a gallon left in it, had tilted over and spilled its entire contents across my floor, staining a lot of important papers, some clothes, a lot of socks, a purse, a stuffed kitten, my bed sheet, and a few pairs of shoes, not to mention sticking three pennies to my floor and coating the bottom of my dresser and bed.
It's grey paint, and nearly impossible to take care of.

Is it just my Bad Luck ?
Or is it fucking Karma. . .. .

Post 30:: I WANNA KISS YOU EVERY MINUTE EVERY HOUR EVERY DAYY.

So, guess what guys ?
After what seemed like a freaking eternity, a band that is particularly special to me has gotten back together.
THAT'S RIGHT.
THE DARKNESS HAS GOTTEN BACK TOGETHER AND THEY ARE ON TOUR.
THEY ARE ALSO WORKING ON A NEW ALBUM.
HELL TO THE YES.
"Hazel Eyes" and "I Believe In A Thing Called Love" have been on my favorite song list for forever. I am so happy about this. .
And of course "Christmas Time (Don't Let The Bells End)" is always a nice song =DDD

Anywayy, the last time that they played a song before 2011, the lead singer Justin Hawkins looked like this::

Now, in 2011, Justin Hawkins looks like this::

. . . . .
. . ... . . Justin Hawkins. What is on your face.
What is that mustache.
You look like a musketeer. . . .

Like really
WHAT IS THAT.
He still sounds as beautifully falsetto as ever, though. . so I guess it's ohkayy.

 I've missed you guys so much <3

Leftovers From Spain.

So, I realized that I never really talked alot about my trip to Europe. . . well, it was great, as I'm sure you can assume, but while we were there, there was a lot to complain about.  My roommate Megan had to write a blogpost every dayy about what we did, to be updated to the church blog, and she was stressing over it. I helped her with it a bit as well. One particular night, our friend Anthony was in our hotel room, and he sat down to write the blogpost. Remember, that he was totally drunk, and can't type well on a good day. . .This is what he wrote:: [I edited out the names for the safety of the people mentioned]]

"over the over night thing we got up at like 1 and we were like sweet sleepin in then we had bfast .............. guessw hat happoned E*** end of story. o ya we had mass...... super fun =) ...okay, i lied. so after like 30 mins of pointless talking from guess who? yup E***! we decided to head down. so we all got on this empty train thingy (metro) and it was empty so we were like sweet then 2 stops latter ITAILIANS................ "FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" we all yelled. as you know they all decided to to crame there smelly asses in the sub with us (joy).......... o ya more ppl got on every stop, it only took up like 3 hours to get to the end of the stop in a 1000billion degree subway=). fuck ya!!!! E*** said were here so we walked out and guess what....................... she got lost............ like 20 more mins went by and we all decided to walk away. Even F**** B** said, "fuck this shit!" i see were we have to go so we went to f8 we got are spot by the road and we made are forts out of paper lololololol jk that whould be dumb we made them out of sheets that the really awsome dude anthony nido brought. we even made him sleep in the cold............. why cuz we were asses........ so it was 113deg. durring the day and we all cryed but wait it gets better there were shit covered portijohns and when the vigIl went on there was a HURRICAIN!!!!!!!! luckaly i had a fort but from what i was told E**** dicided to call apont the nature spirits and cry for rain and thunder and it worked. so like 30 mins latter the storm subsided and we all got out so we bitched for like a hour and then it rained more. we went to to sleep NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! we played cudle tag.
so now its daytime and it was a bit colder only like the same temp as the sun. so we went on are jurrny to go shit and piss but the jons overflowed..... yes im not jokeing..... they were litterly shooting shit at you. lucky magen didnt mind and manned up and went throu the nea deap shit covered flooor >:L <----- that was her face so we became happy.""

. . .so yeahhh, we all had a really, really good laugh over that. I'm still chuckling as I read it now. I don't know if it's a had-to-be-there-to-find-it-funny type of thing, but I hope you laughed or at least cracked a smile over that. I don't think I've laughed harder in my entire life than I did while reading what he wrote as he typed that blog post.  Nea deep shit  .. .LOL.
The bathrooms were really, really, REALLY bad though. Because there were no lights. . . the port-a-john WAS overflowing. So nasty, but guess what ? Even the overflowing port-a-john was preferable to the bathrooms, because there WAS shit all over everything. So. Fucking. Nasty.
'it was a bit colder, only like the same temp as the sun.". . . xDD It was so hot there; it was crazy. . . Gah.
So I have to go now, but yeahh. . bye =D

Post 29:: Same Old Thing As We Did Last Night.

My sister woke me up this morning for absolutely no reason. I was tired as all hell, but I couldn't get back to sleep, so I got up and walked around for a few hours, and eventually crawled back into bed and FINALLY fell asleep again. And then fifteen minutes after I got back to sleep, my mum got home from wherever she was, and woke me up, because 'it's late and the day is almost over already !!"
I didn't know the dayy almost- ended at 12.38, but ohkayy mum.
Then I went to type a paper, and i was so tired that I fell asleep in the office chair. And was woken up ten minutes later by my parents having a huge argument and yelling at each other.
So I gave up on sleeping and fled to the internet like any normal person would.

Link to this year's NaNoWriMo:: Read this and commet if you so choose.

My favorite song at the moment: is 'Our New Intelligence" by the wonderful band River City Extension. The song is off of their album The Unmistakable Man, and I, like I'm sure everyone else did, discovered them because of Warped Tour 2011's compilation CD. You should listen to this song and feel the wonder coursing through your veins as you realize you have no idea what's coming next. Like, most songs are verse, chorus, verse, chorus, bridge, reprise of chorus.
This song just keeps you on your toes the whole time. Just give it one shot, it's about four minutes of your dayy.



Anyhow, that's all for now, kidds. Life has been a bitch to me lately, but you know what theyy sayy.
Be nice to your cock, and your cock will be nice to you.
Maybe that's just a random quote from Mark Hoppus of blink182, but it still applies to every situation.

Post 28:: Angelspit, Blood On The Dance Floor, So On And So Forth.

Last night [November third]] I went down to the Crofoot in Pontiac to see Angelspit, along with Blood On The Dance Floor.

I got to meet Zoog, DestroyX, and Matt James from Angelspit, and I took pictures with DestroyX and Matt James. I think I was a little starstruck for whatever reason, but I couldn't make myself ask Zoog for a picture. ]= But he did give me a hug !!! He only noticed me because my cousin Robin was there, and she had a Blood Death Ivory [Angelspit]] patch on her jacket, and he talked to her a bit. He was like, 'Oh my gosh ! Yes ! That's so cool !" and he gave her a hug. Not, you know, she leaned in to give him a hug. HE hugged HER. And then he hugged me a moment afterwards.

So yeahh, I met a little twelve year old that knew more dirty words than I did when i was 16. I was like, 'woah man. . ". It did not make me think that she was cool. It made me really sad about future generations.


Anywayy, so Brendan had told me that he wasn't coming, because he couldn't get a ride. . I was upset because I really missed him. And then, in the middle of Aim Your Arrow's set, I turned around, just because, and he was jumping up and down waving. I was like, 'OH MY GOD, HOLD ON, THERE'S SOMEONE I NEED TO GO PASSIONATELY HOLD ONTO," and I totally lost my spot in the first row to go grab him. I hugged him for like the rest of Aim Your Arrows's set, and I pretty much held his hand throughout New Year's Day's set, and i was just so fucking happy to see him, I thought I was going to explode into pieces.

The experiences of my night::
> Brendan elbowed my forehead at least four times.
> Dahvie Vanity caressed my face and sang looking straight into my eyes, and then he spit in my mouth. Which sounds gross but for some reason wasn't.
> I got glitter dumped all over my body
> Jayy Von Monroe put his junk right in Brendan's face, and he wrapped in arm around my shoulders to steady himself while singing into the crowd
> Dahvie Vanity grabbed my throat and choked me during 'Death To Your Heart"
> I caught a glowstick from one of the supporting bands on tour, Life On A Pogostick. [they're awesome, go check them out]]
> I got a picture with DestroyX <3
> I safety-pinned an annoying girl's Hello Kitty backpack to her hoodie.
> The girl next to me stuck her gum in the annoying girl's hair
> My dad told Zoog he had a nice skirt. Not, you know, kilt. But skirt.
> Julia thought Zoog was a hobo.
Pictures::

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand, Brendan and I being dorks::

Book Review 2:: Bruiser, by Neal Shusterman.

So, here is our next book::

Bruiser, by Neal Shusterman. Some of his newer-ish work. I expected it to be great.

      It was not great. Good, yes. Well-written, definitely. Great, no. It's about a boy named Brewster. His nickname is 'Bruiser". . OHH, THEY KINDA RHYME A LITTLE, DON'T THEYY, THAT'S SO CLEVER. Anywayy, so Brewster bruises badly. [alliteration !!!]] At least, that's what he tells people who see his skin so badly mottled with purple and red. The thing is, that Brewster takes away the pain and problems of the people that he cares about. This is why Brew always lurks in the shadows and mopes around. Because he doesn't want to make friends. He doesn't want to have to care for anyone, because then he'll be hurt by them--literally. Like, if you get a bruise, it'll transfer to Brew. If you get a cold, it'll transfer to Brew. If you're upset or angry or sad, it'll transfer to Brew.
      The basic plot is a good one, and I thought I would totally know how it ended. . but I didn't.  I
It's a good book, if you like swimming, anger issues, and supernatural abilities to take away things that hurt the people you care about.

Book Review 1:: Pink, by Lili Wilkinson

So, because of my reading habits, I decided to make my first official online book review. Ta-daa.

Here is the current book in question:

Pink, by Lili Wilkinson.

      The basic summary of this as that there is a lesbian goth girl who feels like she's messed up and wants to be, and I quote, "normal". She thinks she will achieve this normality by dressing like the 'popular" kids and wearing pink and such. She also is "confused" because she loves her girlfriend Chloe, but she also likes a boy named Ethan. Part of the story centers around the fact that she 'can't figure out whether she likes boys of girls".
      Uhmmmmmmm  . . . bisexual much ? Seriously. But they don't even mention the word 'bisexual", as if liking both boys AND girls isn't even an option. IT'S LESBIAN OR STRAIGHT !. .. like, what the hell.
      Ava, the main character with all of the problems, gets herself into a lot of messes. I guess the main moral of the story is that if you beg for forgiveness from the people you've hurt, you can always be reunited with that person and everything will be hunky-dory again. This pisses me off for obvious reasons that are SO obvious that I don't even feel like mentioning them. I mean, come on. . not everyone is going to forgive you, and not everything is going to be fine. Maybe in a fiction novel it will be, but not in real life. If you're going to have a book based off of real life, you might as well make it realistic.
      It's an ohkay book, if you like lesbians, musicals, and people who sadly attempt to fit in.